Top 5 Stories NOT in Today’s BubbleMixx

Posted by admin on November 17, 2008 under Environment, Humor, Internet, news | 2 Comments to Read

With 64 days remaining until Barack Obama takes office, and no significant announcements coming from the transition team today, here are 5 stories we’re NOT covering, but apparently everyone else is.

# 5 – The vetting of Bill Clinton’s finances, regarding his foundation and international business dealings. Yes Hillary is a top contender for Secretary of State, and it’s routine that someone’s family finances etc. are scrutinized before taking such a top job but seriously, could this story be any more boring?

# 4 – The proposed bailout of GM etc., should $25B of the $700B the government is allowing AIG to blow on keggers go to Detroit so they can tap a keg too? Yeah, probably, but President Bush isn’t going to approve it, so nothing’s going to happen here for at least 65 days.

# 3 – Pirates seize control of Saudi supertanker; this is clearly an act of war, and just as soon as W figures out where Somalia is they are in for some shock and awe. Big time.

# 2 – Mark Cuban accused of insider trading, the world is shocked, shocked, to learn that billionaire douche Mark Cuban has been accused of trading on inside information. He dumped a ton of stock in Mama.com before it lost almost all value saving him $750,000 or something like that; I may have dozed off during the report.

# 1 – The U.S. economy sucks, and Japan’s is worse. Is this really a newsflash anymore? Haven’t we entered the self-fulfilling prophecy phase of reporting on bad economic times? We get it already. Now get out on the streets and start selling apples.